There are no Linux gatekeepers. There are assholes everywhere, that’s the human condition. I came across these assholes and I learnt that I should take advice and consider it myself.
If you close your brain and listen to random online people without thought, you’ll have a bad time, Linux or no Linux.
This stereotype of people in Linux or open source as assholes is FUD spread by people who have a vested interest in spreading it.
I’ve found people mostly very helpful and courteous.
I have been using unstable on desktop for at least 15 years. Every time a new stable was released that would cause a month of just staying off updates till things stabilized. Recently it’s not even had that issue.
I’ve had to pin a package or two in that time, but unstable has been rock solid otherwise. I even run it on my server.