In my limited experience, there are basically two flavors of Linux:

1. Latest software, everything’s available but it breaks a lot.
2. Doesn’t update frequently, might have to be cautious with third-party software but very stable.

As I’ve gotten busier, my preference for stable distros like Debian has grown. I think there’s also a lot of value in trying for due diligence the first time you install a distro. It’s much simpler to take the time and do it correctly than to try and fix it afterwards. Sometimes it takes a few attempts to get everything set up correctly, but it’s worth it long term.

I’ve had this issue before. My limited understanding is that your home server fetches copies of communities somebody on your server is subbed to. But if you’re the first person, it can take it a few hours to federate (took mine a day.)

I think Debian unstable works great on laptops, and it’s hard to beat for stability.